She Who Must Not Be Named
Jul. 14th, 2009 07:14 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
swatkatThere was a person in my class whom I really dislike. There are a lot of reasons I dislike her, but on the top of the list is this: she does not understand the concept of a debate/discussion. And she loves the sound of her own voice.
Here is the thing - she is a *very* intelligent person. An amazing writer, fantastic poet as well as a thoughtful critic. The kind of person you'd *want* to talk to, because she's so smart. But five minutes into a discussion with her, you will find that you are not going anywhere. Let me give you an example:
She says, 'I think all House's problems stem from his childhood.'
And you might say, 'I'm sure some of them do, but I also think that the infarction screwed him up in a major way.'
And she says, 'Yes, but don't you think all House's problems stem from his childhood?'
And someone else might say, 'His childhood definitely is an issue, but what about the fact that he cultivates assholeishness, takes pleasure playing that role?'
And she will say, 'I know, but don't you think all House's problems stem from his childhood?' LOUDLY.
And so on.
How do you talk to a person like that? You don't. Because, for a fruitful conversation, there are certain requirements, like an open mind, and respect for the person you're talking to, and the ability to shut up and review your own position on a certain matter - if necessary, accede that you were wrong. This acquaintance of mine has none of these qualities, which makes discussion next to impossible. So you don't discuss things with her.
It's easier said than done, of course, because she is very visible, and very vocal, and often makes sense, which will lure you into conversation. She is also hard to avoid, because you run into her in every corner. She comes into your room uninvited and talks to you for hours. She joins you in coffee shop and does not leave.
You must be wondering WHY I am suddenly discussing She Who Must Not Be Named (er, that's a nickname we use). I bring her up, because there are many, many fans like her in fandom. You know, people who are intelligent and who know how to talk, but who also do not understand the concept of debate and are *impossible* to talk to. They are very vocal, and they always have Opinions, and you run into them in every corner of fandom. And here's what I do: I follow the same policy. I avoid them. I ignore them. I point and laugh, because what else can you *do* about a person who will *not* listen? It saves me a lot of energy. It saves me a lot of headache. And it saves me a lot of time - which I then spend on fangirling, which is what I'm here for.
♥
Here is the thing - she is a *very* intelligent person. An amazing writer, fantastic poet as well as a thoughtful critic. The kind of person you'd *want* to talk to, because she's so smart. But five minutes into a discussion with her, you will find that you are not going anywhere. Let me give you an example:
She says, 'I think all House's problems stem from his childhood.'
And you might say, 'I'm sure some of them do, but I also think that the infarction screwed him up in a major way.'
And she says, 'Yes, but don't you think all House's problems stem from his childhood?'
And someone else might say, 'His childhood definitely is an issue, but what about the fact that he cultivates assholeishness, takes pleasure playing that role?'
And she will say, 'I know, but don't you think all House's problems stem from his childhood?' LOUDLY.
And so on.
How do you talk to a person like that? You don't. Because, for a fruitful conversation, there are certain requirements, like an open mind, and respect for the person you're talking to, and the ability to shut up and review your own position on a certain matter - if necessary, accede that you were wrong. This acquaintance of mine has none of these qualities, which makes discussion next to impossible. So you don't discuss things with her.
It's easier said than done, of course, because she is very visible, and very vocal, and often makes sense, which will lure you into conversation. She is also hard to avoid, because you run into her in every corner. She comes into your room uninvited and talks to you for hours. She joins you in coffee shop and does not leave.
You must be wondering WHY I am suddenly discussing She Who Must Not Be Named (er, that's a nickname we use). I bring her up, because there are many, many fans like her in fandom. You know, people who are intelligent and who know how to talk, but who also do not understand the concept of debate and are *impossible* to talk to. They are very vocal, and they always have Opinions, and you run into them in every corner of fandom. And here's what I do: I follow the same policy. I avoid them. I ignore them. I point and laugh, because what else can you *do* about a person who will *not* listen? It saves me a lot of energy. It saves me a lot of headache. And it saves me a lot of time - which I then spend on fangirling, which is what I'm here for.
♥
